Overcoming Challenges, Maximising Unrealised Strengths
Posted by: Avirupa Bhaduri & Alex Linley
This month Avirupa shares some of her personal insights about how she has been using her own strengths and strengthspotting skills to help her through the challenging time of moving house and getting everything organised. Everything worked out well in the end when she looked to maximise her unrealised strengths and draw on the strengths of the Shiriti Women’s Sewing Co-operative to help her…
“February started with an exceptionally hectic schedule, personally. I have recently shifted home and there are a million things that needed attention and tons of new things that needed to be adjusted to. This proved to be a major stressor, and was seriously affecting my relations with my family. So I decided to sit down and try to apply Realise2 to see if I can turn this into a positive experience.
I know I like adventure, I am creative, I have empathic connection. My weakness is order, lack of planfulness, being low on detail. Next, instead of learned behaviour I tried to focus on my unrealised strengths in this context. I asked my daughter what she misses most about me these days.
Back came the reply “You always smiled hugged and kissed me every time after you scolded me for my mistakes, and you soon forgot all about it, when anything went wrong! Now you are always angry and complaining.” Bounceback was instantly on my mind. I hugged and kissed her for that!
I asked my husband next. He surprised me by saying I am less thankful and optimistic these days, which is unusual of me. He also said something interesting, he said “You know you are creative but do you know that you are a great manager, you know how to get things done by people and you know exactly who is best for what.” Drive and connector that’s me!!! It brought a smile to my face.
Armed with this illumination, I took it on me to start small to improve my life for myself and my family. I had a long conversation with my husband about the good things of this decision, about sharing chores and making work done systematically. He is a time optimiser and super-great in order, so he agreed to complement me in this regard. My optimism was once more restored.
I had a number of pending odd jobs, that was weighing down on me, one of which was making curtains for our new home. Suddenly I thought why not give it to Mousumi & Sharmila, instead of a tailor shop. It will be a win-win situation for both of us!
Next week at Shiriti I came with my bundle of fabric, and my friends happily lapped up the opportunity. We had a hearty chatter about my new home, their cheerful curiosity got transmitted to me, and soon I found myself talking happily about my plans for the time ahead. The week after, my curtains were ready, on time and looking lovely.
I paid them their wages after much argument on the due amount. They charged ridiculously low. I used my “strict teacher” voice to persuade them to take what is rightful and fair. As I walked back home with my curtain packet in hand, my heart was full of content and hope for the days to come, and I was thankful for the knowledge of strengths which had helped me see this.”